There ended up being 3 homemade pies for Thanksgiving Dinner. The one everyone enjoyed the most was the berry pie. Especially Andy. Though everyone had their fill, there was still a generous amount of all 3 pies leftover for the following day.

In the midst of all the pre Black Friday sale madness, I decided that I was going to head home early a day, and get some rest in my own bed. After we got home, as I packed up my things my sister asked if I wanted to take any food. I didn’t feel like dealing with prepping food for travel, so I passed. However, I did decide to take a pie remnant home with me – the berry pie.

As I wrapped a sheet of foil around it, I thought of how disappointed Andy was going to be that I took all of it with me. So, I wrote him a little note:

I left the note on the empty pie plate, grabbed my things, and said bye to Elsa. On my drive home, I started laughing to myself about the pie when I realized that in my leave, I didn’t remember to pick up the plate with the pie before heading out.

When I woke up this morning, I got a text from Andy that read:

So my little joke blew up in my face…but, I’m glad and proud to see my caring little nerd has some sass to him. 

It’s been five days since Steve Jobs passed away. Even now, five days later, it’s still difficult to wrap my mind around the idea that he’s gone forever. The world has lost a living legend and an amazing modern renaissance man. Jobs’ contributions to modern society, be they Pixar animation studios or the iconic iPhone, have changed the course of human culture and technological development in previously unimaginable ways. He was to us what DaVinci was to the world in the 1500’s. Like so many others, I mourn the loss of one of history’s most talented visionaries and leaders.

Now, I would love to continue to extol the virtues of Steve Jobs, but that would be misleading on my part. The truth of the matter is that my opinion of Steve Jobs has not always been the most favorable. See, for the longest time, I was a strong opponent to Apple products. Not out of allegiance to the Microsoft brand, but out of my love for technology as a whole.

Boom.

Though I am primarily a Windows user, the Mac OS has been a large part of my computing experience as a whole. I first taught myself to use a computer using outdated Macintoshes in my elementary school’s computer lab, and later on using my Uncle’s Macintosh LCIII. Every time I used a Macintosh, I enjoyed it. As a child, it was intuitive and user friendly.

However, I also had been given a Packard Bell D160 Multimedia PC by father as a Christmas present in 1995, and grew to love the Windows operating system. Though in hindsight it wasn’t that great, at the time the immersive Packard Bell navigator software that booted with Windows was impressive. It simulated an actual living environment, each room with a specific function – living room for media, office for documents, etc. The games that were available (The Journeyman Project comes to mind) offered me a way more impressive computer experience at home than the ones at school did.

In the years since then, Steve Jobs returned to Apple and revived the company with the iMac. At the time, I was enrolled at Lewis Middle School, whose school slogan was “Leading in Technology”. They lived up to it: every classroom and every computer lab was stocked with both the color all in one iMacs with the hockey puck mouse, or with the latest variants of the classic Macintosh line. I once again grew to love the Mac experience. Though I hate to admit it, I loved playing the shit out of Nanosaur at any chance I could get.

Still, Macs came at a premium, and my Dad governed the computer purchases. He was a fan of the more practical Windows platform, so that’s what I got at home. I remember wanting to eventually get a Mac to do graphic design work on when I was in high school. Unfortunately, by then, the revolution started by the iMac sparked the elitism of the Mac brand: if you own a Mac, you’re better than everyone else. As a computer enthusiast who had grown up with an enjoyable Windows experience, I stuck with Microsoft. I understood the power of each platform, but didn’t agree that one necessarily had to be better than the other. Since they were both good, I felt I needed to stick with the one I’d grown up with and was subject to very harsh criticism.

In the years between high school and the present, that resistance to Apple became an absolute disdain for it. I loathed the arrogance of the Justin Long Mac vs. PC commercials. Steve Jobs was perpetuating that elitist attitude I couldn’t stand. This became even worse when my best friend Chris switched from PC to a Mac. At every chance he could get, he would interject how my computer is pathetic because it runs on Windows. Any performance hiccup was interpreted as a plea for a gospel on the superiority of the Mac. Or, in layman’s terms, he became very fucking annoying.

Now, as much as I had grown to resent Apple, I was still a techie, and I still liked my gadgets. I’ve purchased many iPods over the years. When I was a teenager and finally had the option to upgrade from my Nokia 6682 to a smartphone running a real OS, my only viable options for a good 3G phone were the iPhone 3G and the Blackberry Bold. Android was only barely starting to gain traction, and AT&T went many years without carrying Android devices in favor of its exclusivity with Apple for the iPhone. Though I’d always wanted to get a Blackberry throughout my time in high school, I found myself going with the iPhone simply because it’s unique touch screen allowed the best mobile browsing experience possible. So it was with heavy heart in December of 2008 that I “sold out” and became an iPhone user.

Even with iPod and iPhone in hand, I still continued to resent Apple solely because of my resentment of Steve Jobs. I’ve jailbroken every iPhone I have because I don’t agree with the limitations Apple has set on the device. They sell you something they will allow it to do for you, not something that can do everything it can for you. I was outraged at the 30% Apple started charging for in-app purchases, forcing competitors to rely on webapps to circumvent the unnecessary fee, thereby making iBooks a more attractive option with simple in-app purchasing. I was pissed when Steve had his Apple townhall and called Google’s “Do No Evil” mantra “bullshit”. I was furious when Steve set his crosshairs on Adobe (yeah, the company that makes the software that most professional Mac users use a Mac for) and Flash. Even worse was when the iPhone Developer ToS were updated to render the flash-to-iPhone compiler Adobe was planning on including in the upcoming CS update unusable.

Google is bullshit and Adobe is lazy, says the Goblin King!

So, Steve did shit that pissed me off because I like Apple, but I also like everyone else that Apple has been absolutely shitty to. This led me to say (and by say, I mean “post online”) very many ugly things about Steve. God, I couldn’t stand the guy. I admired him for his achievements and business acumen, but hated his totalitarian approach.

A few months ago, I decided that I was going to invest in the Mac platform. As an iPhone and iPad owner, I want to explore the integration that iCloud will offer across it’s devices. I remember that it was only two days after I first had this thought that Steve resigned as CEO. I remember laughing to myself that it was as if by simply having that thought in my head, Steve had won. I was interested in finally giving in on the one front I staunchly refused to give in on, the PC computing experience, and so his work was done. He stepped down in victory.

Once he resigned, I found myself missing having him in charge. Without Steve at the helm of Apple, there was no reason to really resist Apple. My love-hate thing with Steve only worked when he was still in charge and ready to do something more. So in the time that I would normally read the latest on Steve Jobs, I started reading about Steve Jobs. I then started to realize the true extent of his genius and innovation, and the importance of his contributions. I also have come to realize that the very things that I hated about him were the things that I admire the most about him. He was innovative and decisive. He had great standards of excellence and amazing insight. And most of all, when it came to something he had made up his mind on, he just didn’t give a fuck. His word was final.

So, I’ll say it. I miss you, Steve. Furthermore, I’m glad to have shared time on earth with you. I can say that I lived during the era that Steve Jobs revolutionized the world. I don’t regret that I spent so much time hating you – you were kind of a real prick. However, the fact that you had the balls to do all the things that set me off was always something I secretly admired. Now that you’re gone, I only wish you were still around to keep doing what you did for another 20 years.

Rest in Peace, Friend.

YELLOW FRIED CHICKENz Lineup

Gackt – Vocals
Jon Underdown [fade] – Vocals
Yukihiro “Chachamaru” Fujimura [GacktJOB] – Lead Guitar, Backing Vocals
You Kurosaki [GacktJOB] – Guitar, Violin
Takumi Samejima [SUGIZO, Miyavi] – Guitar
U:ZO [Miyavi] – Bass
Shinya Yamada [LUNA SEA] – Drums

Wow. I already liked GacktJOB’s line-up as it was. Adding SUGIZO’s session guitarist Takumi, who I really like after seeing him perform with SUGIZO on the Rise to Cosmic Dance DVD, and Miyavi’s bassist U:ZO were two awesome additions in themselves, but to nail Shinya down as drummer? Gackt managed to score arguably the best drummer in Japan! (Admittedly, my personal preferences make it a tossup between Shinya and his Dir en grey counterpart).  My only point of concern was the inclusion of Jon Underdown as a second vocalist. It’s Gackt – he’s more than capable of covering all vocal duties himself. Now, I’m very glad that he’s a part of the group.

Last month, on 09/14/2011, YFC released their first official single, The End Of The Day. Fans of Gackt’s solo work who’ve enjoyed the more recent singles like Ever and Jesus will feel write at home with The End Of The Day. What makes YFC particularly interesting is the presence of THREE guitarists in the lineup. The upswing to this becomes evident once the song bursts into full speed after the short intro riff. I haven’t paid such close attention to individual guitar phrases like I do with this song since SUGIZO collaborated on Miyavi’s Hi no Hikari Sae Todokanai Kono Basho de single.

Boom.

Much like the guitars, the vocals on the track offer a lot of clever interplay and layering. Thoughout both the choruses and verses, Gackt and Jon take turns singing alternating lines in Japanese and English (respectively). This intertwined vocal melodies create an peculiar dynamic where the two different lines of lyrics work with each other to convey one overall idea & emotion. For example, let’s look at the chorus:

Key: Gackt | Jon | Gackt & Jon

The end of the day…
ANATA no you ni… (Do you want…)
as we make the way…
waraeru hi made… (to be carried to…)
The end of the day…
michibiite kuremasu ka…? (the day when you will laugh?)
as we make the way…
Living for tomorrow

As you can see, the chorus can be broken up into two choruses in different languages that have been mashed up to make one bigger chorus with a shared meaning. This kind of lyrical structure is persistent throughout the whole song. It’s a daring and fresh structure to use, and it pays off and works wonderfully.

The rhythm section is no slouch either. Shinya on drums here is just as awesome as Shinya on drums for LUNA SEA. The bassline is pretty damn wicked. If I had a 5 string bass and more free time, I’d learn how to play it because it’s that good. The timing and rhythm flawless and on point, but given every members’ musical CV, it’s not exactly a shocker.

The PV (Promotional Video, what Japan calls their Music Videos) is shot so stylistically that it manages to breathe new life into what would otherwise be a rehash of a Japanese rock music video that’s already been done countless times. Admittedly, I would have preferred that they tone it down with the blue-filter. Other than that, there’s a lot of energy and style present. Oh, and homosexual undertones. Like, lots of them.

These days, Gackt spends his choruses singing over a tall muscular white guy's shoulders while giving him fuck-me eyes.

When I first watched the video, I laughed to myself that YFC and this PV were Gackt’s way of showing off to the world that he got himself a new white boyfriend that can sing. Let’s take a look at some live photos, shall we?

Gackt & Jon sharing a...whip?

Gackt & Jon...well, you get it.

So, to summarize: Three Guitars. Two Singers. One Really Good Time. Tight musicianship across the board, with many members being Japanese musicians that I admire. Gay undertones and fan-service.

Yeah, I can definitely get behind that. You can call me a YFC Fan.

Pretty Wicked Cover, Gotta Say…

So, this is the first review I’ve written since the old LiveJournal days. Bear with me, I don’t quite have a format nailed down.

ABOUT:

This is the eighth studio album by Japanese Rock (well, technically Japanese Metal as of around 2007) outfit Dir en grey. I’ve been a fan of these guys since 2000, back when they were a major name in the Japanese Visual Kei (read: Japanese version of Glam Rock) scene. For over a decade, I’ve seen this band reinvent both themselves and their musical style with a frequency that would make Madonna jealous. I managed to get ahold of a leaked copy (along with the rest of the internet) of their latest offering, officially dropping on 08/03/2011. I could go on, but this is a review, not a biography, so without further ado…

WHERE IT EXCELS:

If you like Metal and experimental/progressive music, this will definitely hit the sweet spot. The album sails through a drop-tuned turbulent sea on some interesting rhythm patterns and timing changes. Any given song will switch moods on you like a heroin junky going through withdrawals, said mood selection being limited to darker, darker, and darkerer (yeah, that’s grammatically incorrect, but with these guys there’s never an absolute “darkest”.) Long time fans have grown used to Kyo’s use of various screams in place of singing. Not here; a pleasantly surprising amount of the vocals are sung, and man, are they CLEAN. Fans of the screaming and growling won’t walk away disappointed – there’s plenty of them to go around, they just don’t take up the whole album.

WHERE IT FALLS SHORT:

Ever since I discovered this band, I’ve always felt their rhythm section to be their strongest asset. Not to insinuate that Kyo’s vocals and Kaoru & Die’s guitarwork is anything to scoff at (quite the contrary, actually), but Shinya’s drumming, Toshiya’s basslines, and Shinya’s drumming (see what I did there?) are easily the best parts of any of their songs. Sadly, their production team isn’t on the same page as I am. While not terrible, the mixing on the album could do more to really give the drums and bass the prominence they deserve. Focus, as is the unfortunate norm for a lot of rock genres, is on the guitars. They’re good, but come on, let’s acknowledge the other guys too.

TRACK BY TRACK: (In 3 sentences or less)

1) Kyoukotsu no Nari [狂骨の鳴り – "The Cry from Lunatic Bone"]: Less than two minutes of ambient noise. Sets the mood, sure, but I’m far more used to strong opening numbers. They used this approach on the previous album, but Uroboros’s “Sa Bir” succeeded far better at this thank Kyoukotsu does.

2) The Blossoming Beelzebub: Kind of a disappointment for a track with a length over seven minutes. It’s not bad, but there’s no cohesion or clear progression. The best part is the end of the track, which sports a flurry of drums and slap bass that nicely transitions into one of the best tracks on the album

3) Different Sense: This one beautiful beast of a song, blending elements from every phase of their musical career. The contrast between heavy verses and the melodic chorus dares you to try and not to like it. Oh, and it has a solo – remember when those used to happen regularly in Dir en grey’s songs?

4) Amon: Don’t know why this song got a special release with some photobook of sorts. The bass and drums do the most interesting stuff, but even then they’re forgettable. It’s kind of a bland dirge, to be honest.

5) “Yokusou Ni Dreambox” Aruiwa Seijuku No Rinen To Tsumetai Ame [「欲巣にDREAMBOX」あるいは成熟の理念と冷たい雨 – " 'Nesting Within the Dreambox' Cold Rain and the Philosophy of the Mature"): Another dirge, but this one has some semblance of cohesion, along with a schizophrenic personality. The vocals are interesting, and are at their best during the chorus. I dig it.

6) Juuyoku [獣慾 - “Animal Lust”]: Drums go bang, bass goes boom, guitars go everywhere, and vocals go “rawr”. The title fits the song appropriately. You’ll fire this up when you want melodic noise, but you’ll be heard pressed to remember what the song sounds like in your head simply by looking at the title.

7) Shitataru Mourou [滴る朦朧 - "Trickling Ambiguity"]: Love the intro drums – very reminiscent of the Deftones’s “Digital Bath”. Love the way the guitars convey a sense of frantic despair. One of my favorite tracks on the album.

8) Lotus: There’s been some touchups, namely to the vocals and bass, from the previously released single version. Strong chorus, and a great overall mood. Loved it before, love it again.

9) Diabolos: Another let down due to the long length and lack of progression. It goes through a wide range of phases, but they’re not really pieced together in any particular way. It ain’t no “Vinushka”.

10) Akatsuki [暁 - Dawn]: This is a pretty crisp track. Popping bass, banging drums, and interesting guitars. Enjoyable, but alas, not exactly memorable.

11) Decayed Crow: Lots of screaming and persistent instrumentation. Sadly, at this point, it all starts to sound the same.

12) Hageshisa to, Kono Mune no Naka de Karamitsuita Shakunetsu no Yami [激しさと、この胸の中で絡み付いた灼熱の闇 - “And Violence, Tangled in the Burning Darkness of my Heart"]: Another previously released track, in retrospect set the foundation for the musical direction from this album. Like the other singles on the album, it’s had some upgrades done.

13) Vanitas [Emptiness]: THE BALLAD! As much as Dir en grey does melodic dissonance well, they’ve got a real talent for ballads. Though not their best, it’s different from their previous ones and still very good. A nice breath of fresh air for something that sounds distinctly different from the rest of the tracks on the album.

14) Ruten no Tou [流転の塔 - "Tower of Vicissitudes"]: Manages to pull off the feeling that things are coming to a close, but aside from that, I can’t really describe it without saying things I’ve already said about other songs on the album.

-BONUS TRACKS-

15) Rasetsukoku [羅刹国 – “Kingdom of Demons”]: Unlike previous remakes of old songs, this one is VERY faithful to the original version. Even the lyrics sound unchanged. A much appreciated metal rendition of a high energy rock track.

16) Amon (Symphonic Version): I like that it uses symphonic instruments to supplement the original rock instruments instead of replacing them entirely. I don’t like that the original version of this song was pretty lacking. I’m tempted to delete and replace the original “Amon” with this one.

CONCLUSION:

If you’ve read interviews and reviews, you know that this is a highly experimental and unusual album for the band. True music lovers will appreciate it for those qualities, but won’t exactly be blown away by them. Lovers of the band will find a way to convince themselves this fresh offering from the band is the new best thing ever even though they’re won’t truly grasp the meaning behind the music. Dir en grey’s previous efforts have proven successful because they’re not afraid to get weird, unconventional, and experimental and fuse that with more accessible rock/metal songs. This album is 75 minutes of nothing but those very qualities and comes off as a professionally executed metal jam session between the five of them.

Bottom line? This is an album put together for themselves, not the fans, and they don’t give a fuck: it’s up to you whether to take it or leave it, and that’s both it’s strongest quality and greatest weakness.

In part of my redefinition of my life, I had determined that I can’t continue with this habit. It’s both extremely detrimental to my health, and counterproductive to all of my goals. I downloaded the Livestrong quitting coach app for the iPhone a while back. However, I didn’t write or post about it, as doing so would legitimize a commitment to seeing it through. Now, it’s a must.

The app is not only very well designed and responsive, but also extensively featured considering it has a pretty streamlined and simple focus. It’s got a nice customizable motivational home screen, detailed tracking, and taking a page from Xbox Live, ACHIEVEMENTS! That’s right: quitting smoking is now like a game. A very fucking stressful and challenging game.

So, without further ado, my customized quitting plan:

I’d say wish me luck, but I’ve got unshakable determination on my side.

I already assessed my life and made a decision to change. I already made a fitness plan and figured out a format for it.

However, I didn’t see it through. The list of excuses is long…I ended up feeling like it was a worthless endeavor, that I felt like I didn’t have anything to say, that life got too hectic to keep up with it all. In the end, all I was missing was me. Belief, confidence, trust, and dedication to myself.

What I have come to realize in the past couple months is that there is no choice. The time for endless introspection, self-doubt, and carefree living has been passed and is no longer an option. Now, it’s time to truly live up to and become the person I truly am.

Though I’m not religious by any means, my feeling is best summarized by a bible quote:

When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
-1 Corinthians 13:11

It’s time to give up the things I’ve openly resented but secretly took comfort in – not because I have to, but because I WANT to.

This is my personal exodus.

This is me, beta alpha 1.

239 lbs – current weight

160 lbs – goal weight

79 lbs – difference between current & goal weight

39.5 – number of weeks it’ll take to lose the difference at a rate of 2 lbs per week

9.8  – number of months it’ll take to lose the difference at a rate of 2 lbs per week

I’ve clearly got my work cut out for me. Since my last update, I haven’t been doing as much as I can. That said, I have been easing myself into both dieting and incorporating physical activity into my days. I think I’ve finally hit the point where my body is retrained and resilient enough to engage in physical activity on a routine basis without having something as simple as running a mile result in extreme soreness the next day. I’ve also been cooking healthy foods instead of relying on buying food. I haven’t quite nailed down what my exact tracking methods are going to be, but I have been experimenting. So, here’s my report for 04/05/2011:

What I ate:

What I Did

My bike ride to the gym

What I did at the gym. Twice.

So tonight, about 924 calories were burned. My basal metabolic rate (calories burned by merely being a living person) is currently 2079 calories per day. So…guess that means I did really well today, huh?

PHOTOGRAPHS

(Edited for content: the point is to show off my disgusting gut, not my junk)

         

Right Angled                                                Right     

Left Angled                                                 Left       

The only haircut I’m allowed to have

The jawline and hairstyle I look forward to having again